Squirrel for Hire

I suck at math.  On a primal, dismal, below the surface level.  Adding and subtracting are important so you can check your bank accounts.  Fractions are important when you’re baking cakes.  Simple fractions that is, like 1/4, 1/2, 3/4 and MAYBE a sneaky 1/3 or 2/3 if you feel like getting fancy.  Division is important if you need to cut your cake recipe in half.  That’s about it.  That’s all I got.

I’ve been trying to relay this important information to my eldest, only, darling child.  It hasn’t been going well.  My mom tried to help.  My husband tried to help.  And we still ended up on the office floor, Addie in tears with me not far behind.

So I hired a squirrel.

I can not recall his name.  I only know he has a fluffy tail, buck teeth and when you solve a problem correctly, he shouts “YeeHaw!” in quite possibly the best Texas accent EVER.  He is way better at math than me, and his patience is infinite.  For $43.90 per grade he can turn your puddle of tears into shouts and cheers.  You’ll never spend a better chunk of change.  He works for this company called Teaching Textbooks.  It’s pretty great.

I don’t know how things are going in your pandemic world.  All I DO know is that in 2020, if you need to hire a squirrel to teach your child basic math skills.  That’s okay.

walk wy chipmunk

Okay, this isn’t a squirrel. it’s a chipmunk which is like a squirrels smaller cousin. In all these years, I guess I haven’t taken a squirrel picture! I bet he’s good at math.

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